How do you deal with Judgmental People?

Hello, friends! Thanks for checking in!

Do you agree that people are judgmental by nature? I mean, are we just born to condemn without further evidence or explanation?  Basically, when people hear bad things about us, they instantly believe without a question, and when good things are said, they have second thoughts. It’s quite appalling to think that some are raised in an environment where discrimination and gossiping are mere diversions, and judging other people’s lives becomes normal as breathing.

When I was in childhood, I experienced different forms of judgments. Since I was too small and skinny back then, my classmates often tormented me because of my figure. They also debarred me from joining their groups so I was often alone with my books and my little toy. One time, I accidentally eavesdropped my classmates’ conversation, and I was so wretched upon discovering that I was the subject of their discussion. Amidst displeasure, I remained listening to the reverberation of their relentless clatter and laughter. Needless to say, their spiteful words made me bleed unremittingly. Those early years were really hard-hitting, so I had this presumption that the world was punishing, including its discriminating people, both old and young.

Growing up, I never escaped from the curse of bigotry. I couldn’t forget the humiliating experience I once had during my elementary years. This involved my terror teacher and adviser when I was in Grade Two. As far as I remember, she called me to answer her question regarding a Math problem. It was a simple question actually, but I was not able to grasp the question because of too much nervousness and fright. Unfortunately, I never answered even a word so she shouted at me blatantly, as if no one was there, as if no one was listening. Since I was too afraid, I just remained silent, but she continued with her mortifying words. She said that I was just a pathetic being from an ill-fated family, and that my father was a disgraceful drunkard. Because of too much degradation, I just wanted to vanish back then, but still, I chose to pacify myself and accept that it wasn’t my worth.

The unpromising stories of my childhood continuously haunt me until today, but they also serve as my inspiration to do and be better. Now, every time others tell a gossip, I just listen to show my care and interest to them. After, I see to it that the issues never sleep or live in me. Sometimes, we just have to go with the flow, but that doesn’t mean that we’re going to tolerate and imbibe wrong doings. Similarly, when I hear friends or peers saying undesirable things about me, I just try my best to ignore them. Well, what I just think is that everybody is entitled to their own opinions, and we can’t please others all the time. As long as it doesn’t kill me, I’ll just get even with a smile.

Indisputably, our world today is so much infected with hatreds, reprisals, and judgments. Instead of judging people, let us just help or pray for them. We might think that we know them already so we easily give our negative feedbacks, right? Certainly, we won’t actually understand them unless we live in their shoes, and that’s the only time we can realize how unkind and mistaken we are. We might be surprised that we can’t even handle half of what they have dealt. Indeed, there are reasons why they do what they do, and there are reasons why they are who they are.

Let us remember that judging a person doesn’t define who they are….

It defines who we are.

 

© Lebana 2018

/Anabel Raymundo/

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